I have finally got rid of my blades. Very happy me ^^ And I feel so much better for it. I'm gonna take a good look at my life and make some decisions about who gets to be in it, not that people care (hah) but yeah. Not gonna waste my time on people who don't deserve it. I have realised I'm ok with being who I am. Hell, I'm proud of who I am (thank you Lady Gaga) and it's about time I felt that way really. 

So fuck you to anyone who hates me, I stopped caring quite some time ago :)

Also I love Sam ahaha <3

I'm a Goddamn Superstar ✯

Aaaaaah, I love my friends to pieces :')

I can't stop thinking about her. It's driving me mad. I don't know what to do.

Time for a nice selfish little rant I think.
Why the fuck do I care so much about people who barely give a shit about me? I want to help my friends so fucking much but when I'm upset its like it doesn't matter. I suppose it's my fault really. I hold it in and let 'er rip and then people think I'm crazy but I'm not crazy yet and then they avoid doing that again like the fucking plague. And when they do talk to me I either have picked a bad time to vent or I just get :/ faces at me which isn't really a conversation. I'm lonely, bored and hell I'm selfish (but who isn't) and I fucking need someone to talk to once in a while for a proper conversation. I try so damn hard to get people to trust me and open up cuz I want to help them I just wish someone would try that hard for me. Then again, I'm just not worth it.

Sometimes I look at you and wonder when you'll realise I'm lying.
Then I see how happy you are, and I hope to God you never do.

I miss you already..

I can't believe how much I miss you already. ♥

Things are changing. People are adding me on MSN. People are actually calling me on Skype! And I've seen my friends every weekend for a month. I've got money (real money!) in my bank, and it'll be going in every week hopefully. Plus my dad's still going to give me pocket money if my room's clean. I've got new, and very loud, blue earphones (finally) and I've been sober for 24 hours. And I'm starting to care less wether I'm fat or not. :)

In my drunkness I must not not not tell you how much I wish you were mine. Stoppit.

My head is on a stick, wobbling about on a dashboard I am not sure who I'm talking to, but I need to pee really badly x)

Feeling a bit cocky. Got my Disability Living Allowance sorted today :) £19.55 a week for "an indefinite period". :)

:D

I think I may have fucked up. I think you know. And I reeeally didn't want you to know.

Fuck it. No point beating about the bush. I love you. x)

I think I need to go to Scotland. Like, soon. Listening to bagpipes just makes me realise how much I want to be there.

Sigh. You're living in a world of secrets and lies. Secrets and lies...

My heart is drunk with a beauty my eyes could never see. ♥

I hate myself for cutting but it feels good to be in control of something for once.

Hopefully getting some cash tomorrow when I get rid of my shitty DVDs. Grrr, why haven't I won the lottery yet?

Here's hoping a certain someone is ok tonight x

Sigh. Skint yet again. Must check bank balance.

Ahh! I'm so happy! Thank you thank you thank you!
Also I was thanked! Oh, happy day! :D I am awesome, like a cake filled with mindfuck. I have helped. I fixed something! I AM NOT COMPLETELY USELESS!!! :D

I can't explain why you're awesome. You just are. You've had tons of shit happen to you and you're still standing. Hell anyone who can bring themselves to wake up to this world deserves a fucking medal. But especially you.

I'm just a little too scared to get close to people. Everyone who said they would be there for me left.

Grr. I fucking hate it here sometimes. I wish I could be down Loughborough having fun with some friends. Or at least talk to them. Here the only entertainment I have is trying to kill this damn fly in my room.

You make me laugh
You make me cry
You make me feel
Like I want to be alive.



Thank you ♥

Live every day to its fullest, because yesterday is gone, and tomorrow may never come.

My friends...they are all beautiful people :)

Love her,
Miss her,
Want her,
Can't have her.

For Carter Hendrix Jones

Charming little angel
Ailed by Menkes Disease
Rescued by the Almighty Lord
Time to finally be set free.
Everyone who loves you
Remembers you in their hearts
Heaven is your paradise
Even though we're far apart.
Never shall you be forgot,
Dear, your suffering was a crime
Revenge can't be sought for this, so
In my heart you'll be 'till the end of time.
Xtremely daunting was your fight
Just rest your weary, gentle soul
Only the best are taken early, and
Nothing else could fill this hole.
Eternally you'll be blessed with grace,
Sleep tight, dear child, in Gods embrace.

Rest In Peace, angel ♥

Oh, how I love mindfucking people.

Must stop eating so much. Can't stand being like this.

Debating wether or not to get involved... :/

Aha, I was right. Awesome day. No photos. Plenty of crisps and weed though. And to a certain person - Thank you for making me feel like I wasn't completely worthless :) You know who you are. ♥

Today will be a good day. :)

Complete. Total. Mindfuck.

Sleep continues to elude me...

I am not skinny. Nor am I drop-dead gorgeous. But I love everyone I know, and that's what matters.